Loom Chapter 10

10)

Power Struggle

 

     Another Thursday morning dawned rainy, a month and a half after the first unwanted gift had appeared in the Tower.  Raven's sixth month of pregnancy had begun and there were beginning to be signs around the Tower to hint to the impending arrival.  The furniture that had been in the room nearest Raven's own had been cleared out so the bedroom could function as a nursery.  The room had been Terra's during her brief stay in Titan Tower and the empath had originally expected Beastboy to object to removing the last artifacts of the girl's presence.  He had in fact not said one word against the changes, instead expressing an eagerness to paint the room and set up the baby furniture that he and Raven had together selected online.  At the moment the room had a fresh coat of a soothing mint green on the walls, the color neutral to fit either gender.  The changing table had been put together and the crib, still waiting to be assembled, lay against the wall opposite the window.  Cyborg had promised to help Beastboy start work on the complex looking mahogany piece of furniture that evening.

 

     That mornings training session was low key, the persistent rainy weather seeming to have drained something out of the group.  Starfire entertained herself with jumping rope while Robin jogged on the treadmill and Cyborg did push-ups.  As had become routine, Raven moved through stretches and yoga positions quietly.  And as usual, the changeling joined her.  He had learned that she appreciated quiet as she moved though the poses and lately he had respected that, but this morning his mind was full to overflowing.  Since the dead raven there had been not a peep from the cult.  Robin had been researching frantically and still had no leads.  The lack of information had made him testy and restless.  It didn't help that Jump City's residence were now nearly just as troublesome as the cult was.  Cyborg had been forced to place buoys around the island with clear signs letting people know the island and Tower were private property.  Still every few days a trespasser or two was caught.  The police, who didn't seem as pro-Titan as they had once been, usually just fined the intrusive person and took them back to the mainland.  There were a few instances the authorities had no choice but to arrest the trespassers though.  There had been two men last week, both drunk and armed with rifles.  There had been a small group of women with a crudely made bomb that probably would have never actually detonated.  Still, the threat was clear.  The everyday, god-fearing people were beginning to take matters into their own hands.  After all, who wouldn't stop the birth of the Anti-Christ if they had the power? 

 

     "Rae?"  Beastboy said softly, knowing she was nearing the end of her exercises.  A CD was playing some upbeat tune, Starfire having paused in her fast paced jumping to cut the music on to drowned out the sounds of gospel music that had begun to blare once again.  There were more pontoons now, the bay never completely empty day or night. 

   "What?"  She snapped, her head darting towards him as she stood on one foot.  The stress, combined with nagging heartburn and a poor night's sleep had made her moody. 

   "There's something I wanted to talk to you about."

   "Imagine that.  You never stop talking Garfield.  We have all day you know, there's no need to interrupt me when I'm trying to focus and relax.  You do understand I'm doing these stretches to prepare for childbirth, right?  Even if you don't care about me I know you want your precious Bug to come out unscathed."  She muttered what he assumed had to be curses in her native tongue and he fell silent.  She had been having mood swings the last couple weeks.  Such shifts in wellbeing were common in every pregnancy.  Even in the most harmonious of pregnancies, he reminded himself.  Harmony was the last word he would use to describe their experience so far.  Having drunken men dragged away from your doorstep at one in the morning while shouting "Whore of Babylon" at the top of their lungs was upsetting.  Finding mousy women just outside your window with cardigans, crucifixes, and a bomb they'd built using instructions they'd found online was unsettling.  Raven was a prisoner in her own home and even within the fortified walls there was no guarantee of safety. 

   "Do you want a bottle of water?"  The changeling asked kindly after Raven had clearly finished, her stance relaxed on the thin foam mat.

   "Yes please," she said softly, sighing.  She took the bottle from him, her left hand reaching up to grab his wrist as he started to pull away.  She glanced over at her teammates, reassuring herself they were not watching the pair.  "I'm sorry Gar."

   "Don't worry about it."

   "No, I shouldn't take things out on you.  I am sorry."

   "I know.  Still . . . it's just all part of the experience."  He smiled sincerely and cast a look over his shoulder at the others.  "Dude, me and Raven are done."  Robin looked up from his concentrated glare at the far wall.  He glanced at the clock on the wall.  There was another fifteen minutes of mandatory training left, but he couldn't bring himself to insist they stay.

   "Sure, hit the showers," he said, turning back to the blank space on the wall that he had been glaring at as he ran.

   "Oooo!  Together?"  Starfire asked with delight, never slowing in her blinding pace as she swung her rope.  The alien was a hopeless romantic.

   "It's just a saying Star," Beastboy told her with a laugh before following Raven out the double doors.  He waited until they were halfway to the kitchen before he started to speak again.  "I talked with Rita last night."

   "I know.  You made Starfire watch me for an hour last night remember?"  Raven had not responded well to being "babysat" while her constant guardian took a little personal time.

   "Maybe I should apologize for that, but I'm not gonna.  There's no such thing as too careful now Rae."

   "What did Rita say?"  She prompted, rolling her eyes.

   "She's retiring," he said after a long moment.

   "Retiring?  From Doom Patrol?"

   "She's seriously considering it, yes."

   "I didn't think Mento would ever retire," Raven admitted as they entered the kitchen.  The empath opened the fridge, looking for something to snack on.

   "He isn't.  She's thinking of . . . leaving."

   "Rita and Steve are . . . oh .  . . I'm sorry to hear that Gar."  She pulled her head out of the refrigerator to face him.  The couple had been like parents to him and though Mento was not Raven's favorite person, she knew the changeling loved him. 

   "Yeah, well . . . Steve is just . . . very devoted to being a superhero.  And he isn't very flexible or emotionally available.  I guess it was just a matter of time."  He sighed and then shrugged, leaning heavily against the countertop.  "Anyway, the reason I brought it up . . . Rita said that she's going to move to some small town in the Midwest, I don't know . . . anyway she said that she thought maybe we . . . you and I  . . . should come stay with her until Bug is born."

   "Are you serious?"

   "It's getting out of control here and . . . I mean it's like that friggin' cult turned the whole city against us and . . ."

   "Against me you mean.  They aren't trying to sneak into the Tower in the middle of the night to kill you after all."

   "They're going to have to kill me to get to you Raven, I promise you that.  I'm just saying, maybe it would be easier to just leave for a while, let this die down."

   "So you think we should just run away from the problem?"

   "I wouldn't call it running away exactly, just . . . hiding out for a while."

   "Until it all blows over?"  The empath was rooting around in the fridge again.

   "Exactly," Beastboy agreed with an enthusiastic nod.

   "Because things like this always blow over, right?  People become convinced that the unholy mother of the Anti-Christ is among their population, but forget all about it when she disappears for a few months."  She shut the appliance door loudly, a cold piece of fried chicken in her hand.  She waved the drumstick at him and he back away like it was a knife.  "This isn't going away!  People don't just forget!  Why are you always so simple and idealistic?  It's maddening."  She took a bite out of the chicken leg, glaring at him. 

   "I just don't want you or the baby to get hurt!  What am I supposed to do?"

   "Maybe you should just accept that you can't do anything."  She glared harder still, taking another bite out of the cold bird.  Lightning fast the changeling darted, his hand jerking the drumstick right out of her hand.  He growled and threw the left over chicken into the garbage can.  Raven stared at him, her mouth open slightly. 

   "I don't want you eating meat!"

   "I'll eat whatever the Hell I please!  You're being incredibly petty!"

   "Petty?"  He roared, pulling open the refrigerator door and grabbing a large peach.  He forced it into her hand.  "I'm petty?" 

   "What's wrong Beastboy, don't know what it means?"  She threw the peach at his head, but he managed to duck out of the way and it splattered with a loud thump against the wall. 

   "I know what petty means!  And I am not . . ." he trailed off, blinking down at her like he'd suddenly forgotten what was happening.  "Raven . . . what's wrong?"

   "What are you talking about!  You threw my chicken away and suggested we run off into the sunset and be farmers or some st . . ."

   "I mean . . . we're fighting.  We're fighting and nothing is happening."  She seemed to shrink back into herself some, taking a step away from him.  "Nothing is exploding.  Nothing is sizzling or flying around the room."

   "I do have some self-control," she told him sharply, frowning.  There was something behind her eyes though, a fear that he easily picked up on. 

   "What's wrong Raven?"  He insisted again, taking two strides forward until he was gripping her upper arms lightly. 

   "Nothing," she said sternly, but the fear was growing behind her irises. 

   "Tell me," he said softly, but firmly.  She began to pull away, the changeling's right hand moving from her arm to the back of her neck to stop her.  His fingers pressed slightly at the spot just below her head.  Of all the places he had elected to touch her in the last couple months, he had avoided the flesh between her shoulders and head.  There were connotations to this sort of contact that a normal human would never understand.  In the animal world holding this place was a symbol of control.  Of dominance.  For millennia kit and cub alike had been carried by a parent's gentle grip here.  Since the dawn of time males had held their mates here like an embrace during moments of passion.  There had never been a time that this flesh wasn't nipped or outright bitten in power struggles between pack member and outsider alike.  Even if Raven hadn't understood the meaning behind his firm pressure instinctually, she certainly would have read enough from his emotions to know there was something more, a deeper meaning to his grip.

   "I'm not your bitch to be brought to heel."  Her voice had dropped to nearly a whisper, the sound far more ominous than the shouts she'd indulged in just moments before.  The words were hissed, her voice tainted with something inhuman. 

   "All week you've been an emotional rollercoaster, but there haven't been any magical outbursts," he told her, ignoring her statement.  "Something's wrong.  I'm pretty sure you already knew that though.  What's happening with you Rae?"

   "Nothing's wrong."  Further her voice drifted from its usual tone, the sound strangely reverberating.  "Let me go Garfield."  Instead he pushed his fingers more firmly against the place he held and she responded with a strange hissing growl.  Red bled into her eyes as they narrowed, a second set opening above them. 

   "You need to tell me.  How can I help you if I don't know what's going on?"

   "You can't help me.  You horrid, miserable green . . ."

   "Easy Rae, that's just the hormones talking.  Don't say something you don't mean."  She glared up at him, her lips pulling back from her teeth.  In her current state they appeared deadly sharp and plenty menacing. 

   "This is what you understand . . . right animal?"  She growled in threat, gnashing her teeth.  The changeling shook his head at her and sighed. 

   "Hormones and stress, that's all this is."  Firmer still he pressed at the tender place on her neck, feeling her stiffen and then relax some.  "There now, takes some nice calming breathes and let's talk about what's happening.  Just calm down."  She seemed to comply after a moment, her shoulders relaxing even more, her eyes reverting to just one pair of amethyst that still shimmered with heat, but were far more subdue.  A gloved thumb rubbed firm, soothing circles as a deep vibrating sound rose from his chest.  It was a purr, but different from the other much more house cat like vocalizations she had heard from him before.  This was more like the soothing hum of a lion.  Raven took a deep breath.  And then another and another.  Slowly she relaxed, her hand coming up to press at his chest so she could feel the vibration of the sounds he made at the source.  Her eyes closed, tight muscles finally losing their tension. 

   "Do you remember when Robin was questioning me about my protection spells on the Tower?"  She asked evenly after a short eternity.

   "Yes," he replied, pausing in his purring.

   "I didn't lie but . . . I neglected to add some relevant information."  She sighed, her eyes still closed.  "I used to keep protection spells on the common areas, but by the time the incident occurred I couldn't anymore."

   "Why not?"

   "My powers had started to weaken."  She felt his concern and she shook her head slightly.  "I will be alright.  It's the pregnancy.  I hoped it wouldn't happen, but I knew it was possible."

   "Why would being pregnant affect your powers at all?"

   "It's like . . . cats in a way.  A tom cat will kill kittens that aren't his own so that he can produce a new litter with the female.  Demons are similar.  A male demon would gladly force a pregnancy to end so he could impregnate a female.  But what a male demon finds appealing about a female is her magical potency.  So if a female is magically stunted during the latter months of her pregnancy she won't attract male attention."

   "Oh."  He could think of nothing more to say for a moment.  He released his hold on the empath, but she didn't retreat.  "How bad is it?  I mean, how weak are your powers?"

   "Weak enough that we were able to have one of the worst fights we've ever had and not so much as a floorboard creaked." 

   "Yeah . . . I'm sorry about the chicken Rae.  That was over the line."

   "I'm sorry too.  About everything I said."

   "It's already forgotten," he told her reassuringly.  "Why were you so reluctant to just tell me?"

   "Everything that's happening . . . the fact that I barely have the ability to protect myself now, it makes it so much worse.  Not just for me, but for everyone else too.  I don't want to be looked at as weak.  I don't want the entire team constantly feeling like they have to protect me." 

   "We're your family, of course we're going to protect you, powers or no powers." 

   "I don't like feeling so useless.  There's nothing I can do to fight against the cult or even the normal crazies that show up every so often now."

   "I understand, but you don't have to be afraid.  I'll keep you safe.  I swear I will."

   "By shepherding me off to live with Rita in some cornfield?" 

   "If you don't want to go we won't Rae.  It was just an idea.  I'll come up with something else."

   "Have you had any other ideas?"  The question was honest and the changeling shrugged slightly and smiled.

   "I wanted to go to the press and tell them the baby is mine.  I thought I'd tell them that we're a couple and it was just a thing that happened.  Nothing magic at all about it, just us being young and reckless."

   "No one would believe you at this point."

   "Maybe not, but I wanted to do it at the very start.  Robin said no.  He said I couldn't fix a lie with another one and if tried I was off the team.  He said it was best to just ignore the tabloids.  You see how well that worked out." 

   "Yeah," she agreed, looking past his shoulder to where the peach managed to still cling to the wall, part of the fruit nothing but mushy goo.  "I am having mood swings," she told him softly, walking around him to clean up the mess she had made.  "It's very unsettling."

   "I know it's gotta be.  I know being out of control is really uncomfortable for you."

   "I'm not in control of anything anymore," she lamented softly, wiping the last bit of peach away with a paper towel.

   "That's not totally true Rae.  I know the mood swings are scary, but you are still you.  And your powers will come back, right?"

   "Right."

   "So this is just a momentary inconvenience, not a lack of control."  She frowned and shook her head slightly.  Her "momentary inconvenience" was, for the time being, a very real problem.